there is ne0n yell0w tape wrapped ar0und the white sh0elaces 0f the w0man standing near me with faded jeans and a fading face and near the fr0nt n0t ten feet 0ver my learning right sh0ulder stands an0ther learning w0man with a right sh0ulder t00 n0dding her head t0 s0me unkn0wn beat similar t0 mine and when her beautiful dreads turned t0wards me i turned away and see that we are 0n a busy tw0-lane headed west but the driver d0esn’t st0p anytime s00n but when he d0es there is a child’s pink hairbrush l0dged as if tucked 0r stashed in an 0ld and hiding bush and i wanted t0 tell the pers0n in the seat next t0 me fuck y0u f0r sitting y0u privileged c0cksucker but i think twice and instead l00k at their cr0ssw0rd and i supp0se i sh0uld’ve said that 18 acr0ss was abba but i am 0ff n0w and they are g0ne n0w and i pr0bably w0n’t see them again and this fills me with a sadness but i d0n’t kn0w what type yet and i am tired 0f writing ab0ut life and tired 0f having t0 think s0 y0u’ll f0rgive me if i put the pen d0wn the disp0sal 0r d0wn the st0rm drain 0r perhaps just d0wn and instead c00k myself a nice pizza dinner with fresh d0ugh fr0zen in the back freezer 0f aisle 14 and with sauce made with l0ve fr0m call0used 0live hands that hand-picked these t0mat0es and draping cheese 0ver the t0p like s0me elder’s blanket and caking it with pepper0ni that didn’t cause ri0ts 0r pr0tests when the h0st was slaughtered and in fact it didn’t even cause a ripple as if killed by the ever-p0inting finger 0f g0d myself and y0u’ll f0rgive me f0r n0t telling them the answer t0 18 acr0ss and y0u’ll f0rgive me f0r n0t being brave en0ugh t0 pay my c0mpliments 0r grab the hairbrush and sc0ur 0ur earth t0 give it back and y0u’ll learn perhaps 0ne day that i wasn’t thinking then and y0u’ll learn perhaps that i maybe never was and that this was all f0r n0thing and y0u’ll get t0 the b0tt0m 0f this straining piece and want t0 scream and maybe y0u’ll even tear it up 0h w0uldn’t that be a thrill tear it up please tear it up and as y0u d0 i will laugh my g00d laugh and y0u will tear y0ur g00d tear and y0u will find my peeling and sun-sc0rched river view h0me and slam d0wn the d00r with a vici0usness n0t sp0ken ab0ut and sc0wl like the shad0wed di0genes hand me y0ur b0ttle and i will hand y0u a slice and we will b0th be a certain type 0f peace again but we w0n’t kn0w what type yet.